Archive for February, 2016


By Vernalee
There’s a person in your office who could win the best actor award for looking busy! You know exactly who I’m talking about. There he goes! He stays on his cell phone supposedly responding to urgent business calls. He takes his iPad everywhere. In meetings, most people think that he is taking notes, but I saw him surfing the internet before switching to play candy crush. Everybody knows that he is playing games, but when you are the “favorite child,” you can do as you please. His company travel will make a Delta Airline pilot squirm, because Mr. Looking Busy frequent flyer miles exceed his! He brings nothing back from his trips but an attitude; a superior one at that! So don’t be fooled with his looking busy routine. It’s his cameo office appearance. Rather, be on guard because while it appears that he is looking busy, he is really busy looking at you so that he can tell the paranoid boss that you can’t be trusted. Oh what a tangled web he weaves! He’ll rob you blind and attempt to steal your dignity while simultaneously grabbing your hand for a word of prayer! What a transparent hypocritical “busy looking guy” that without looking hard, you can see right through him! You may not believe this, but some offices have multiple employees who are masked in professional disquises. Speed walking down the hall rudely disturbing working employees is Mr. Looking Busy – female companion. If you thought he was a piece of work, words cannot expressively describe her. It is no wonder that productivity is down! There is too much excitement, disruptions, and interruptions. The culture has definitely been professionally altered. Rather than working, everyone is busy watching the entertainment that these disruptive busy looking / looking busy employees create. Their side show has become the show; it has taken precedence while work performance has become second rated! Incredible, I’ll say!
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By Vernalee
This is a true story … beware if you find the contents relatable or familiar.
The dream date turned out to be everything but a dream as he related to his gorgeous date that his fiancée was not what he thought; not living up to his expectations. What? “Fiancée? Why did he invited me to dinner – were thoughts circulating through her brain as her blood fiercely boiled! Startled by his comments as she looked at this immaculate professional handsome gent, she pondered her words and moves. Then the words blurted out. “Get it right with her. Decide what you want. I cannot be a part of this charade which will lead to someone getting hurt and I don’t want it to be me! I’ve been there!” Walking away was easier than getting involved in a love triangle; a point of no return.
The Pointer Sisters had a 1975 hit record called, “How long – I betcha you gotta a chick on the side.” The lyrics went like this:
“I betcha got a chick on the side –
It might hurt me for a while
But one thing I am sure
I’ll get over you, yes I’ll find someone new
Each time I open up my heart
It seems to just get torn apart
How long
Will this game go on
How long
Oh oh how long.”
For sure, she is not a background singer melodically humming a “somebody done somebody wrong” song. Kudos to her for taking the high road and not relegating herself to be that other side chick; being in a second place spot or a backstreet girl. Thinking like a Queen makes you act like one! She refused to play his game! What was he thinking or was he testosterone guided? When she told me the story, I said, “Go girl … I take my hat off to you!” Cleaning up an old school saying removing the vulgarities where it can be printed, I relate the phrase, “A man can only do what a woman permits.” Some say women learned well from their male counterparts. I’m not sure, but the triangle is no longer male exclusive. Based upon infidelity surveys and evidence, I guess they taught the female species the lessons that they learned and acquired substantially well. Roosters and hens are playing the same game and little baby chicks are sprouting up everywhere. The pupil and teacher are now playing ball on the same field! Some people start a game that they regret they played! I say, “The rooster has come home to roost!”
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By Vernalee
“You can’t put the genie back in the bottle” technically means that you can’t
revert a situation to how it formerly existed by containing, limiting, or repressing information, ideas, etc., that have become commonplace or public knowledge. Be careful. Exercise good judgment. We don’t possess the magic to go back in time; to put stuff back once it is released. Watch and guard your thoughts, tongue, behavior and action. Wisdom is best utilized on the front end. Once it’s out, it’s out!
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By Vernalee
“The bigger they are, the harder they fall” is a phrase used to ​emphasize that the more ​important or ​powerful a ​person is, the more ​difficult it is for them when they ​lose ​their ​power or ​importance. When they are up, many unnecessarily flaunt their resources. Often they relegate many to be beneath them while talking to them dastardly; cussing them out at a whim. Their ostentatious cruelty is covered up by a flavorful imitation of pretentious conduct that is as morally corrupt as the sky is blue. Though they cut a good figure, they wear the cloth of ruthlessness day in, day out. Can I get a witness if you know one or two! Never once did they stop to reflect that they were not good caretakers of what they possessed. Just as it was given, it can be taken away. When and if they are stripped, miraculously they will feel what their counterparts felt when they stripped them. Payback makes the surreal, real; the pain unbearable; the difficulty to rise tantamount to the fall. Power and influence are not insulators to pain. Anyone can feel it, if they unwisely test the limits! Just ask the person who hit the ground!
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By Vernalee
Let me share a lesson about a meal that extends far beyond food. A friend once had this fabulous dinner party. Decorations flowed bountifully; valet parking was offered. The presentation was elegant. Showcased was a smorgasbord of delectable dishes – the best of the best (lobster, caviar, prime rib, champagne, etc.). You get the picture, right? However, halfway through the event, there was no more food and drinks; it was gone! Hungry guests can be your worst enemies. So instead of the elegance of the decor, the fabulousness of the home, and all the parlayed bells and whistles, the food shortage is what was remembered. It made the affair … the talk of the town! Quality must be congruent with quantity. Did anyone consider the food quantity in terms of the number of guests? Though this example was centered around food, the application is far stretching. Preparation is key to any successful outcome. In many cases, it’s better to be prepared than smart. Whether it is a meeting, a presentation, or hosting an event, be prepared. Professionally, personally, and spiritually – ample preparation is the best investment of your time. Preparation gives you the tools and the vision that you need to maximize opportunities and be successful. With an integration of preparation and smartness, your vision is keener; your outcome is more predictable. Let preparation be the compass that directs you!
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By Vernalee
Today is Valentine’s Day, a day to show expressions of love. Love is in the air …. everywhere! LOVE – a four letter word with a meaning that is higher than high; deeper than deep. The definition of love is provided in I Corinthian 13: 4-8.
4 Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, 5 does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, 6 does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8 Love never fails.
It ventures to say that we have to daily and continually work at loving people – God’s way! To love in this manner is challenging and will take all that we have to stay true to its meaning. For example, you cannot love someone and hold in your heart “a wrong suffered;” an injury from the past! You cannot be a part time or fair weathered lover and be in compliance with this biblical definition. Stop using the word – love – loosely. The 64 words in this scriptural reference are simple and not complicated. Yet, to love God’s way is a tall order. Examine the text; continually work on compliance; keep the instructions penned in your heart, mind, and soul! For most of us, it is work in progress. Yes, 1 Corinthian 13: verses 4-8 are four powerful verses that describe love from the biblical definition! How do you rank? You know the answer and so does God! Happy Valentine’s Day! Happy Sunday! God bless!
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By Vernalee
Pictured: A Barbie Collection of Solange Knowles’ wedding. Beyoncé is on the left.
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Pictured: The Hanna Barbera Big Wheel.
I confess as do many other Mothers who may admit! Over twenty five years ago, I played with my daughter’s Barbie dolls as much as she! That’s right! My daughter and I would shop for outfits for her collection of Barbie’s and dress them elegantly. It was an expensive undertaking. On Saturday mornings, I would help my little darling Phoebe (nicknamed Elzie Poo) coordinate the clothing which she kept in one of my old suitcases. (She still uses that little red suitcase today but it stores her cosmetics). Anyway, we would spread the clothing out on the bed until we matched the right pieces! Her Barbie dolls were fashionably “dressed to the nines.” No wonder she loves fashion; the process started early! For her graduation from college, I bought her a Graduation Barbie doll with a degree in her hand. Taking you back farther in time, do you remember those mobile contraptions that noisily identified your child’s location? Referred to as the Big Wheel, it was probably one of the greatest inventions ever! The annoying buzzing sounds would drive me crazy, but it would pin point the whereabouts of my driving son instantly! At five, my “cool sunglasses wearing” son with his little paddy feet could spin and maneuver his Big Wheel performing stunts like Evil Knievel with unbelievable precision. All of my friends would watch my son Scooter (whose real name David sounds foreign because no one knows it or uses it – then or now) glide down the streets rocking and rolling with his mobility stunts. Motherhood has many treasured memories! Saturdays are great days to reminisce!
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By Vernalee
Pictured below: Models Anansa and Beverly Johnsonkwekudee-tripdown memory
Every woman wasn’t made to be a “pencil thin” size 2. Just look around at the mass population! Now that a size 12 is considered full figured, there are more of us in that category than not…including me! Of course, I am on a campaign to become more physically fit, healthier … and of course, lose weight. Oprah and I are rolling together on this journey! It stands to reason now that I am in my 60’s. Did I mention the sluggish difficulties to this process? Yet, it must be done for me … and my loved ones! Nothing is more valuable than a healthy mind, body, and soul! With Anansa Sims Patterson (supermodel Beverly Johnson’s daughter), and tons of others being in the dress size 12 and over, we stand among over 100 million (representing 67% of the population) that retailers cannot ignore. Our buying power is too great. Money talks! Surfing through the channels, I recently heard one of the advisors on Diane von Furstenberg’s reality show say, “Confidence has nothing to do with size.” I confidently agree! Here’s a shout out to my fabulous full figured ladies and to our journeys of becoming physically fit and healthier!
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By Vernalee
Is there a magician on your job? Can he / she do what David Copperfield cannot? That’s impossible! Can they pull a rabbit out of a hat? Can they make cards appear, disappear, and reappear? Hush, your mouth! They can do better than that! They can make themselves disappear! They visibly sit at their desks, but their production is invisible. Hmmm. Assignments, reports, emails, and assigned tasks are never submitted. What? Perhaps, there is some mistake, because I see them clicking their computer keys and conversing continuously. That’s correct, but it’s deceiving; it’s a slippery slope of mastered perception. Those keyboard strokes represent them shopping online, playing solitaire and candy crush, surfing the Internet, visiting their Facebook page and other social media sites, among other personal tasks. Don’t be fooled, their telephone conversations are for sure not dialogues with clients or work related. Some assume the role of being the office detective as they walk around investigating and sticking their nose into other employees’ business. With their ears glued to your office walls, they are consummate snitchers – providing any and all information to the boss. With perfection, they talk out of both sides of their mouth like a ventriloquist. Add nepotism to the mix and they could smoothly rollout their tricks in a Las Vegas Magic Show. They are a co-worker’s nightmare and a troublemaker’s delight! What a hot mess! Here’s the best part of their tricks! Drumroll, please! They are never disciplined, counseled, and receive a big fat paycheck for work not done! Sometimes, they get payroll advances too. Without a doubt, they would be fired anywhere else for their shenanigans and their high error filled production rates. Don’t raise your hand, but you know exactly who they are! Some jobs have multiple “zero production / troublemaking employees.” As for the zeroes, why should they care when they are getting over like a fat cat! They can even figuratively cut a co-worker into two parts! Sounds like old black magic to me! Even, Harry Houdini would be impressed! Abracadabra!
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By Vernalee
There are Seven Words that we should eliminate from our vocabulary if we wish to be successful. They are:.
1. Might
2. Usually
3. Should
4. Won’t
5. Likely
6. If Only
7. Really

Simply stated, these seven words denote the following:
Might conveys possibilities; usually, doubt; should, lack of confidence; won’t, a defense mechanism; likely, a prediction; if only, no control; really, no real value.
Don’t use words that will hold you back from achieving your goals. Use words that will put you in control of your destiny; words that will launch and stabilize your success! Positive thinking is powerful. Words come from thoughts. If you think it, you say it; if you say it; you do it! Good habits are hard to break! Shoulda, woulda, coulda … must become words of our past. We must eliminate them and other negative ones as we move to the next level – achieving our excellence! We are now on a different plateau with a different mind set. See you later my friend … as we both continue to step toward the arena of excellence!
Photo credit:; Source: About Small Business

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