Archive for May, 2017
Since this past Sunday which was Mother’s Day, this week has been focused on the topics of Mothers. For sure, we deserve our due!
So today, I close this series by taking you once again to the Bible.
Can you walk with me?
In Exodus 20:12, the first commandment with a promise is given.
“Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you.” Esphesians 6:1-3 follows suit.
That commandment is applicable to all of the parents’ children. As our Mothers and Fathers age, it is our Christian responsibility to take care of them.
After all, it was their hands that took care of us!
As one of my dearest friends and I recently discussed, we cherish our roles of being caregivers to our parents.
It is a privilege being there for them; to bring happiness to their aging years. Nothing beats the joy that we receive from giving and providing for them!
We are blessed to have our parents in their old age; cantankerous or not!
To whom much is given, much is required!” Doing beats excuses!
Doing is honoring; it is our Christian duty.
Photo credit: www.quotesgram.com
In a memorable Today Show episode, there was a survey that queried if it was disrespectful to call your parents by their first names.
94% of the participants said Yes; 6% said No.
I pondered that question for a moment. In our household, not only would it have been disrespectful to call my Mother or Father by their first names, I might have been backhanded.
I cannot fathom the thought of speaking to my parents, now or then, by uttering a first name salutation. “Hey there Phoebe and Walter …. What’s happening?”
Oh my! Out of reverence and fear, I never even considered the thought.
I was taught that a child should stay in a child’s place. Dignifying your parents in speech and conduct with the upmost respect was part of that decorum. Being in their presence commanded a high sense of etiquette. Their authority was not to be questioned or challenged.
Alright, I will confess. I like most kids was no angel. What I could manage to achieve behind their backs without getting caught was another thing. So much for my adolescent mischief … moving along!
Passing the torch of respect, I would never permit by children to call me by my first name.
To them, calling me – Verna -is not an option.
Though trendy today, hopefully,
they will never considered a first name greeting and make that mistake.
Call me old fashioned if you like. I call it respect!
Photo credit: www.metroparent.com
I have heard it more than once; hundreds of times to be exact.
“Women raise their daughters and love their sons.”
Purportedly, there are statistics that are used to add credence particularly as it relates to Black Mothers.
Let’s take s look.
Mothers are nurturing.
We are taught to love, guide, and protect our little ones.
As I am a Mother of two adult children – a son and a daughter,
I must say that I value my role and am honored to be the Mother of two wonderful, loving, adorable kids. Am I boasting?
Of course, I am!
Anyway, I feel that I reared and love them the same.
Of course, that is my opinion; I’m judging myself. Right?
I disciplined them equally; rewarded them similarly; showered them with mountainous love and affection. Both were taught to love the Lord, respect authority/people, honor their elders, be caring, and all of the other southern rudimentary guidance/direction that I passed along pertaining to character, values, leadership, morals, responsibility, etc. As Mothers, we want our sons to respect and love the women in their lives and not abuse their authority. We want our sons to be good Fathers. Their leadership is important.
It is no different for our daughters. We want them to be loving and respectful women; independent. We do not want them to be abused or disrespected as women.
The key to success is for men to treat women as they would want someone to treat their Mother, sisters, or daughters. Bingo!
As parents, we only hope and pray that our foundation was as solid as a rock and that they will remember the lessons taught.
I trust that my now little big ones will continue to be good responsible people. When they go from our laps to our hearts, we pray that God’s grace and protection will travel with them and shield them. When our little boys and girls become adult men and women respectively, we can only hope that they will cushion the lessons of the heart.
We want good children – sons and daughters. What a blessing they are and their goodness is!
When all is said and done, “Job well done” is the music that we parents want our ears to hear!
Photo credit: www.piniterest.com
I hear it all the time!
“My Mother gets on my nerves!”
It’s an expression that many children think and some have the gumption to say. The smart ones dare not quote the words in their Mother’s presence; if they know what’s good for them!
Why is that! It is simple.
Mothers have unconditional love. Since they want the very best for you, good Mothers tell you what you don’t want to hear; they give you unsolicited advice designed for your well being!
Mothers also have no boundaries to their ever present intrusiveness. Her control and “Do as I say” tactics can make you robotic or take you over the edge! Hush your mouth!
Mothers are so truthful about your behavior and their assessments of the aftermath consequences are beyond absolute accuracy.
The truth can be excruciatingly stinging! Ouch!
Their words and views usually hit the nail on the head every time; with pinpoint precision at that!
How accurate they are without glazing into a crystal ball!
They know your thoughts before you conceive them; your steps before you take them; your actions before they come to life! They knew you before you knew yourself!
Just like you can’t fool Mother Nature; neither can you fool your Mother!
Mothers not only know you better than most; they also know how to put the fear of God in you!
Yes, that’s right!
You better not talk back or finish their sentences for them at any age!
Children should stay in a child’s place regardless of age!
Remember that if you forget all else!
Now as for me, you will never hear certain expressions leave my motor mouth. I’m not that courageous.
My 92 year old Mother has a saying that has survived through the years, “I brought you into this world and I’ll take you out!”
I believed her then and I believe her now! Besides, it was she who taught me, “A hard head makes a soft behind!”
Photo credit: www.buzzfeed.com
Conducting an experiment, a well-known advertising agency placed an online ad for a Director of Operations. Although it received over 2.7 million hits, only 24 applications were received.
The job description, though brief, read in part: Have to stand all day; work at least 135 hours a week; little or no sitting; requires considerable mobility; ability to lift at least 75 pounds; ability to proficiently multitask; receives no vacation or days off; receives no compensation or bonus pay.”
Several applicants unanimously said, “This is ludicrous!” They laughed and asked, “Who would do a job like that; Is this legal?”
These tasks and more are performed by us Mothers everyday – rain or shine! Notwithstanding these functions, add in a 40 hour work week to the existing responsibilities.
Being a chef, a chauffeur, a housekeeper, and so much more – come with the territory.
In fact, interestingly enough, the duties of motherhood never leave. They stay even when our adult children leave the nest. Our motherly love, concern, worry, joy, and all of our emotionality remain but shift as our children move from our laps to our hearts!
Thus, a Mother’s job is never done!
Photo reprint: www.organicbabyatlanta.com
(Vernalee pictured with her children David (Scooter) and Phoebe on Mother’s Day 2015).
My children were taught from infancy the importance of Mother’s Day to me. I trained them early. I may be disappointed if I am slightly overlooked on my birthday, but Mother’s Day is very special; it is my day!
Don’t forget me kids!
It’s a day to reflect my Motherly Connection to my little big ones. It’s a day that I remember all of the Motherly tasks that I performed over the years. It’s a day that I look at my children and pat myself on the back at how nicely they matured; a testament to planting good seeds and watching them magnificently grow. It’s a day that I too am thankful for being blessed with a 92 year old Mother.
Yes, we Mothers are special people with special privileges. We know not our place. We stick our heads into our grown children business all the time. We advise; they listen. That’s our job. It never grows old. It never goes out of style.
So today, I provide this commentary and prayer.
“I thank you God for your grace for allowing me to be a Mother; to love and pamper my children.
I thank you for keeping my Mother on the face of this earth to share her wisdom with me, her grands, great-grands, and great-great grands.
I ask for your mercy and covering to those whose Mothers have left this earth and gone to be with you Lord. Let their children find peace in their memories and teachings which will last to time indefinite.
I pray for my four nieces who are facing Mother’s Day without my sister, Barbara. Strengthen them. Let them know that they are not alone for they walk with you Lord as they admirably keep their Mother’s traditions alive.
I ask for your continued blessings, guidance, mercy, grace, covering, protection and love for my loved ones and me. Thank you Lord!”
I give a shout out to all Mothers. Be blessed! Enjoy your day today!
I now share with you the following Mother’s Day facts. I know that this blog post is a bit long today, but we Mothers are worth every minute of your reading time.
History on Mother’s Day:
* Mother’s Day originated in the United States in the early 1900s. Mother’s Day is meant to honor mothers and their influence in society, maternal bonds and motherhood itself. In the United States and Canada, it is celebrated on the second Sunday in May, but in other parts of the world it is sometimes celebrated in March, as well as in other months.
Interesting Mother’s Day Facts:
* Mother’s Day is often associated with Mothering Sunday, a Christian holiday.
* Mother’s Day has also been linked to Cybele, a Greek tradition and Hilaria, a Roman festival.
* The first Mother’s Day was celebrated in 1908. Anna Jarvis honored her mother Ann Jarvis with a memorial. She died in 1905, before Mother’s Day became a holiday.
* In 1912, Anna Jarvis trademarked both ‘Mother’s Day’ and ‘the second Sunday in May’. She also created Mother’s Day International Association.
* Mother’s Day became a recognized holiday in 1914 in the United States.
* Approximately 122 million phone calls are made to moms on Mother’s Day in the United States.
* In most countries and languages, the word for mother begins with ‘m’.
* The most common flower for Mother’s Day is the carnation; pink and red for mothers who are alive and white for those who have passed away.
* A legend states that carnations were made from the tears of Jesus’ mother when she wept at his feet when he was crucified.
* Of all the flowers bought for holidays, one quarter are purchased for Mother’s Day.
* The amount of money spent on Mother’s Day in the U.S. is approximately $14 billion.
* Common gifts on Mother’s Day include: flowers, dinner or lunch in a restaurant, jewelry, gift cards, clothing and treats such as a trip to a spa. Books, CDs, housewares and gardening tools are popular gifts as well.
Research has proven that there are actually health benefits to receiving flowers.
* In Bolivia, the date chosen for Mother’s Day was based on the day that women participated in a battle. Other countries have also chosen the date for Mother’s Day to coincide with holidays that also celebrate women.
* The writer of The Battle Hymn of the Republic, Julia Howe, tried to start a Mother’s Day in 1872. It was an antiwar observance first held in 1872.
* In the former Yugoslavia, children would tie up their mother on Mother’s Day. In order to be freed she had to pay them with treats.
* Mother’s Day is celebrated in close to 50 countries in different parts of the world.
Interesting facts and history, I’ll say!
Happy Sunday! Happy Mother’s Day! God bless!
Photo credit: Vernalee’s photo gallery; Source: www.softschools.com
Stop walking back down memory lane.
We are not about to eat Alphabet Soup.
Remember that dish!
Rather, we are about to fast forward.
Get with the program.
You will be amazed at how our language and words have evolved with the times and changed too.
Many words that we commonly use today did not exist before 1977.
Take a look.
3. Eye Candy
9. Party animals
14. Road Rage
20. Man cave
28. Speed dating
34. Baby bump
39. Face Palm
Now, I have a question to ask.
How many times did you go to the dictionary to look up any of the words?
Admittedly, I went several times looking for definitions, but not before I watched an informercial; took a not so good selfie; checked my voice mail; unfriended a few folks on my social media; and got dressed by accenting my outfit with a stylish black hoodie.
Just so you know, I am on my way to meet my number one and only daughter who is a millennial and who can be occasionally classified as a shopaholic. Since she is a bonafide fashionista, she is entitled. In fact, I love the bling, bling that she accents her style with.
The guys say she is eye candy. I agree; she is absolutely stunning!
See what these new words have done!
What a difference 40 years has made.
So, that’s my shout-out for today.
Photo credit and Source: www.msn.com
There are Seven Words that we should eliminate from our vocabulary if we wish to be successful. They are:.
6. If Only
Simply stated, these seven words denote the following:
Might conveys possibilities; usually, doubt; should, lack of confidence; won’t, a defense mechanism; likely, a prediction; if only, no control; really, no real value.
Don’t use words that will hold you back from achieving your goals.
Use words that will put you in control of your destiny; words that will launch and stabilize your success!
Positive thinking is powerful.
Words come from thoughts.
If you think it, you say it; if you say it; you do it!
Good habits are hard to break!
Shoulda, woulda, coulda … must become words of our past.
We must eliminate them and other negative ones as we move to the next level – achieving our excellence!
We are now on a different plateau with a different mind set.
See you later my friend … as we both continue to step toward the arena of excellence!
Ready, set, go!
Photo credit: www.business2community.com; Source: About Small Business
To wear your emotions on your sleeves means that you show your emotions openly in public rather than hiding them from other people and keeping them to yourself.
When this happens, people can read you like a book. For example, if you have been emotionally injured, your heart brokenness is reflected on your face and in your actions. There is no mystique about you; you’re wearing it!
You become too easy to read. For your adversaries, you become easy prey.
You can be played like a fiddle, because you are showing others – what gets under your skin.
Certainly, that is not where you want to be. There are benefits to not showing your emotions to everyone. Strategy is one of them. Privacy is another. Everyone doesn’t need to know your feelings or your business.
Through your non-discreet revelations, you open yourself up to scrutiny, attacks, and being in the position to be taken advantage of.
Learn to “go about your business,” not showing your emotions, and in some cases, wisely keeping your mouth shut. In many instances, you will be glad that you did! Your hidden agenda and guarded secretiveness may serve you well; they may become your protective shield. Otherwise, people will be able to see what you are feeling/thinking when you reveal your “heart felt emotions on your sleeve” for open viewing.
You are an emotional target as long as you remain in the open!
Photo credit: www.comedyflavors.com
“Revenge is a dish best served cold.”
This statement stops you in your tracks.
Historians are not sure where the saying originated, but it means that revenge is best served not fresh after the insult occurred, but after enough time has passed so that the target won’t see it coming.
Revenge is defined as a form of “primitive justice usually assumed to be enacted in the absence of the norms of formal law and jurisprudence. Often, revenge is defined as being a harmful action against a person or group in response to a grievance, be it real or perceived. It is also used to right a wrong by going outside of the law. This is because the individual taking revenge feels as though the law will not do justice. Revenge is also known as payback, retribution, retaliation, or vengeance; it may be characterized as a form of justice.”
“Revenge served cold” is very satisfying to those who seek retribution. They like to hit people when they least expect it.
They regard vengeance as more satisfying if it is not exacted immediately.
It suffices to say that there are different strokes for different folks.
Though revenge may be sweet or best served cold to some, who has time for revenge?
“Is it an effective utilization of your time?”
Besides, doesn’t the Bible teaches us that – Vengeance belongs to God. In the book of Romans; Romans 12: 17 -19, to be exact, we read:
Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.
Now I ask, “Are you not fearful of getting back what you gave out?”
Karma does not always exact kindness. It renders what was stored.
When you keep the focus on you, there is so little time to think about hurting others.
It is always fashionable to “Do unto others as you would like them to do unto you!”
No one wants to sit at the table to eat a distasteful cold meal even if it is sweet?
Photo credit: www.pininterest.com