Archive for September, 2017


By Vernalee
sports nickel. com
There he goes!
No, it isn’t Mighty Mouse flying and singing, “Here I come to save the day!” The vision is clearly Underdog! Remember him!
For those of us who remember, Underdog was a humble/lovable superhero who was Shoeshine Boy’s alter ego.
He always changed into his superhero suit in a phone booth, which would explode afterwards.
That clumsy guy was known to cause a lot of damage, but whenever his Sweet Polly was victimized, he rose to the occasion.
In general, Underdogs are the persons that no one expects to be victorious.
The Underdog is usually not the best equipped to carry out the mission, but amazingly, he/she gets it done!
Let’s take a closer look.
What is it about these Underdogs? We see it frequently.
For example, the team least expected to win carry their teammates to victory.
Is it tenacity?
Is it courage?
Is it the lack of fear of starting over with nothing?
Is it the agony of defeat juxtaposed against the joy of winning?
Do they work harder when challenged or under pressure?
Is it humility?
Perhaps, they are not weighted down with abundant over-confidence, puffed up pride, and lofty arrogance.
Maybe, they have thrown out of the window the superficial air that many of their counterparts carry.
It is difficult to quite put our fingers on it, but we should find out where their secret lies; exactly what makes these underdogs tick?
Have they removed the lingering fear that it is “me against the world” syndrome? Maybe, they have realized that we never walk along.
We just have to stop sometimes and notice God’s footprints in the sand.
When we equip ourselves with the gumption and motivating spirit that the underdogs possess to not give up and race to the finish line, we will then exemplify their spunk to continue our journeys.
It is then and only then that we will see a pathway to victory and hear the melodic sounds that accompany courage.
Blessed quietness!
What is that sound that I hear?
It is the background music of their sing along theme song, “There is no need to fear, Underdog is here!”


By Vernalee
Mrs. Elaine Saunders - D.C.
Elegance never goes out of style.
It dresses up a person with class.
Hats contribute to that form of elegance.
Hats add a look of distinction.
They are in a class all by themselves.
I remember the days that you would rarely see a woman in the southern churches without a hat. My Mother, aunts and women of her generation wore hats, matching shoes and purses to church. Sometimes, they added gloves to round out their look. How chic! There is a lady in my hometown named Molly. I have never seen her without her signature hats. Her husband, Jessie jokingly says that she owns hundreds in every style and color. Hats make a woman look distinguished, sophisticated, and all dressed up. Although I am not a hat wearer, I love the look!
I love the elegance!
It complete the look with class.
Photo reprint: – Mrs. Elaine Saunders, District of Columbia


By Vernalee

So many times, we try to make something out of nothing.
You know what I am talking about! Don’t act naïve.
We form bonds with people and then have to decide where and how they fit.
Challenging; right?
One such challenge is defining the boundaries of a relationship with a male that is close, but not intimate.
Which brings me to this question.
Is he your friend or your man?
No one knows the answer to that question better than you!
Some things just will not fit no matter how hard we try.
Some things are definitely not what they appear to be outwardly.
So back to the question.
Who is this man?
Many times, it is awkward and closely akin to trying to fit a square peg in a round hole.
Particularly this is the case when we meet someone that we want to be more than that person is willing to be.
That situation really becomes a problem.
We cannot let our thirst for a relationship coerce us to make a man, our man – when his actions and our reactions to him only signify that he is no more than a friend.
Are you confused?
Have you ever found yourself in this position?
Most likely.
Let’s see if these 10 signs shed any light as to whether it is better to be his friend than to be a couple.
Here we go!
1. You prefer to hang out in groups.
2. There are no sweet words between you.
3. You talk openly about other women & men.
4. You don’t make the effort (to look special, etc.) for him.
5. Neither of you feel any jealousies.
6. He says, “You’re my best friend” more than he says “I love you.”
7. You have more laughs than romance in your relationship.
8. It doesn’t matter if you have to cancel a date.
9. You don’t miss him when he’s gone.
10. There is no physical spark.
Listen up!
When he is more than a friend, these 10 things will not define your relationship.
Quite the contrary!
You will experience traits like being overly anxious where you cannot wait to see him; wanting to spend alone and quality time with him; feeling disappointed if he can’t make it to your date; and so much more.
The classification is important as you dont want to lead him on and you certainly don’t want to be led down the wrong path.
And of course, you don’t want him as a blocker. If he is so closely identified with you as your man when he is not, he essentially become a deterrent to your meeting someone else.
Can I get a witness?
So don’t fool yourself with who and what he is – your friend or your guy?
Know the difference.
Your heart, your head, or that inner voice will tell you. One of the three spills the beans every time.
Realize this – everyone cannot be your man, but a selected few can be your friend.
The criteria is different.
So is the expectation.
As you are well aware – some things go together; others just won’t fit.
Be a smart cookie. Know this …
Friendship to a male friend and love for your man are two different things; make no mistake about it!
Remember, male friends are some of the best!
I have a few.
I love them … they love me, but as friends though!
Photo credit: swta photo archive; Source:


By Vernalee
An empty purse frightens away friends is an English proverb which means that when one’s financial situation deteriorates, friends tend to disappear.
When the cash is plentiful, so are the friends. They are everywhere. You can’t get rid of them … but are they really friends?
Prolific author Thomas Fuller said and I quote,
“He’s my friend who speaks well of me behind my back. If you have one friend, you have more than your share.”
We were taught, “If they are your friends, they will be with you through thick and thin.” If they disappear when the cash is low, they were only there for the benefits, not the friendship.
They fit the bill, “Nobody knows you when you’re down and out!”
You don’t need fake friends – whether you are up or down; with cash or not.
It’s better now than later that you found them out!
By the way, this proverb is gender neutral. For my guys, I didn’t want to leave you out, (the same is true for an empty wallet), so this one applies to you too!
Photo credit: www.;


By Vernalee
There has been a number of theories and quotes on the types of friends who walk through our lives. For me, the version that hit the nail on the head is outlined in Bishop T. D. Jakes’ sermon on “3 Types of Friends.”
Bishop Jakes called them, “Confidants, constituents, and comrades.”
1. The confidants are people who are for you. Your confidants love you unconditionally. Confidants weep with you, rejoice with you, and are happy for you….Confidants will make sure that you reach your destiny.
2. Your constituents are for what you are for.
3. Your comrades are against what you are against.
Jakes cautions us to not confuse the groups, because constituents and comrades will leave you! The latter two are joined to an external interest/issue of yours, but not you per se.
If you have two or three confidants in your lifetime, according to Bishop Jakes, you are blessed!
I thank God for giving me the wisdom to discern that a diamond is coal first!
There have been times that I have been wrong and erroneously classified friends. I have been left blowing in the wind. Have you?
It happens to the best of us!
We can be fooled because people can theatrically show synthetic traits that make them appear genuine and real when in fact, they are not.
It’s important to know who’s who in your life!
Recognizing and discerning them are critical steps in this identification process.
Bishop Jakes breaks it down better than me. The video tells it all. Take a look!

Photo credit: www.quotesgram.comH


By Vernalee

As blog followers, most of you know that my Mother passed away and went home to be with the Lord last month.
Since that time, I find myself unnoticeably speaking of her, until I thought … I always did! I always talked incessantly about her; it was innate.
Yes, there are so many lessons that I learned from that woman; so many Southern sayings that still resonates; so much wisdom that she gave me.
We don’t have to wait until holidays, their birthdays, or Mother’s Day to think of and be appreciative of our Mothers.
I am so glad that that those actions of selected dates/time frames of reflections did not characterize me.
So as I think of my Mother today, I share with you a writing that I discovered some time ago. It meant a lot then, it means everything now. Take a look!

“When I was 4 years of age: My Mommy can do anything!
When I was 8 years of age: My Mom knows a lot! A whole lot!
When I was 12 years of age: My Mother doesn’t really know quite everything.
When I was 14 years of age: Naturally, Mother doesn’t know that either.
When I was 16 years of age: Mother? She’s hopelessly old-fashioned.
When I was 18 years of age: That old woman? She’s way out of date!
When I was 25 years of age: Well, she might know a little bit about it.
When I was 35 years of age: Before we decide, let’s get Mom’s opinion.
When I was 60 years of age: Wonder what Mom would have thought about it?
When I was 65 years of age: Wish I could talk it over with Mom once more.”

I know that in the Heavenly host, my Mother is smiling at me and saying, “My baby (i.e. since I never grew up) sho can talk (sometimes too much) and she can write too!”
Today, dear Mother, Ms. Phoebe, thanks to the World Wide Web, the whole world knows of you and your wisdom.
How’s that for a shout out!
Missing you!
Photo credit: Verna’s Family Album; source:


By Vernalee
Often times, we rely on so many other people and sources to find the answers when the answer is God.
He has been by our side all along.
There is an old expression, “When there is nothing left but God, then God is all that you need.”
My pastor always say God is –
a way maker;
a heart fixer; and
a mind regulator.
Search no more.
God is the answer!
Try him!
Lean on him; don’t rely on your own understanding.
Our God is an awesome God!
He reigns!
Happy Sunday!
God bless!
Photo credit:


By Vernalee
Doesn’t that doggie look so adorable?
He is the cutest thing!
His alluring appearance reminds me of some folks that a few of us considered – confidantes!
We could tell them anything or so we thought.
Close your mouth for a moment.
Let me tell you something…
1. Protect your secrets;
2. Guard your words;
3. Be selective about who you tell what to … It’s common sense.
I’m sure that you have heard this advice before – time and time again.
I have!
Of course, we don’t always listen.
** If someone tells you other folks business, they’ll tell yours!
It doesn’t take rocket scientist intelligence to figure that out; it’s plain and simple.
If you forget the essence of this simple idiom, remember this.
** You are not exempted from gossip particularly from a person who has diarrhea of the mouth!
Don’t assume that their behavior will change – just because it’s you!
They took the liberties to put your business out in the streets because you provided the fuel!
The “big mouth” who brought you someone else’s information will surely float yours out! It’s fair exchange to them. It’s the personification of the “bring and take” theory.
Because you let your guards down, your information is now freely circulating through the universe for all ears to hear!
Why would they be discreet?
They could care less.
Did you forget?
They are bonafide blabber mouths.
Besides it’s your business; not theirs!
Photo credit: unidentified source


By Vernalee
For the record, who told you that “you were all that and a bag of chips?”
Was it confirmation from your colleagues or from your inflated ego?
Wrong answer!
Sure, you have some positive attributes, but it does not give you the right to think that you are mightier than thou! C’mon now! You are not! Stop elevating yourself above others. Your nose is so high in the clouds that you cannot even speak to folks.
Dodging folks but seeking them for your personal gain is not kosher. Be careful, your playhouse can be torn down. In fact, it is crumbling now. See the debris!
Though no one wishes upon you what you have done to them and others, a landslide fall from grace is perilous.
Your pockets may now have greener linings, but money doesn’t make you better than anyone else!
Everyone should be treated with dignity and respect. Sooner or later, you will learn!
When it happens, I surely wish that someone informs me; a simple email will do!
In the end, remember that those thin easily broken potato chips are greasy and high in saturated fat and calories. So, your “bag of chips” is just as unhealthy as the treatment that you are dishing out to others!
It doesn’t taste as good now; does it?
Photo credit:


By Vernalee
“The bigger they are, the harder they fall” is a phrase used to ​emphasize that the more ​important or ​powerful a ​person is, the more ​difficult it is for them when they ​lose ​their ​power or ​importance.
When they are up, many unnecessarily flaunt their resources. Often they relegate many to be beneath them while talking to them dastardly; cussing them out at a whim.
Their ostentatious cruelty is covered up by a flavorful imitation of pretentious conduct that is as morally corrupt as the sky is blue. Though they cut a good figure, they wear the cloth of ruthlessness day in, day out.
Can I get a witness if you know one or two!
Never once did they stop to reflect that they were not good caretakers of what they possessed. Just as it was given, it can be taken away.
When and if they are stripped, miraculously they will feel what their counterparts felt when they stripped them. Payback makes the surreal, real; the pain unbearable; the difficulty to rise tantamount to the fall. Power and influence are not insulators to pain.
Anyone can feel it, if they unwisely test the limits!
Just ask the person who hit the ground!
Photo credit:

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