Do I tell my friend that her man is cheating?
This letter from one of my followers raised my eyebrows. It’s simple, but complicated. See for yourself.
Dear SWTA Staff,
I am having sleepless nights. The problem has nothing to do with me. It has everything to do with my best friend. Here’s what happened. My husband and I were having dinner. We noticed this couple kissing and cuddling. When he raised his head, I was startled. It was my best friend’s man! How disgusting! He didn’t see me, but I saw the white of his eyes. Do I tell her or do I keep my mouth closed?
“Don’t know what to do friend”
Dear “Don’t know what to do friend,”
Your letter poses a question that is difficult to answer. I know better than most because the same thing happened to me about twenty years ago. Only the setting was different. My cheating friend’s episode unfolded in the mall.
Needless to say, I was torn between loyalty and minding my own business. My decision then was to stay out of it, but it tormented me for months whether I had made the right decision. You have to do what is right; what your gut tells you. However, that could land you in several spots and tie you up like a knot. Their problem could easily become yours. Because of the difficulties on what steps to take, here’s a simple guide from the experts.
1. Make sure that you are right.
2. Record or take a snapshot of the action.
3. Talk to your friend’s partner.
4. Give some hints to your friend.
5. Invite your friend somewhere to have the final talk.
6. Come straight to the point.
7. Present your evidence.
8. Encourage your friend to go home and discuss it.
9. Do what you feel is right.
10. Put yourself in your friend’s shoes. What would you want or expect?
Is the answer easier? Probably not!
It’s a tough decision. I know not the answer. Here’s what I suggest.
Be strategic. Be thoughtful. Consult confidentially with a trusted friend or expert. Let your conscious and your heart be your guide. What are the consequences? Where do you draw the line? Regardless of your answer, the fact remains that you have to live with your decision. Think and think hard! Pray for wisdom to make the right choice and to do the right thing!
Note: This column is for entertainment purposes. Please consult a trained professional as necessary.
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