Posts Tagged ‘CHEATING’

PostHeaderIcon “THOU SHALL NOT GET CAUGHT”

By Vernalee
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“Thou shall not get caught” has colloquially been called the eleventh commandment particularly when it’s applied to the familiar term, cheating. Some people are sloppy cheaters. Others cheat with safeguards in place. Preventing or minimizing their chances of getting caught out weigh their logic of not cheating at all. When you become a serial cheater, your emphasis is on cheating on your mate as opposed to cultivating a healthy meaningful relationship. How sad! Some cheaters will not stop at one affair. Multiplicity becomes their motto.
We know the names of celebrities whose cheating escapades and stories are broadcasted, but cheating is not exclusive to the elite. It happens all over.
I swear every time I look around, I hear about somebody cheating and getting caught. It is everywhere; some incidents are mind boggling; some are intriguing; others are downright scary. Bottom line and hint to the wise – if you cheat, you may get caught. If you get caught, there are consequences. Getting “caught with ya pants down or your hands in the cookie jar lands you in dog mess” every time. I just love southern expressions. They do bring home the point. Don’t they?
Please know that I did not invent any of this that you are about to read, but here are a few stories of gossip that captured my attention. The names are removed to protect the innocent. Allow me to share.
* A friend of a friend saw her friend’s husband with another woman sitting on his lap at the woman’s (the other woman’s) family reunion chewing away on a piece of bar-b-que ribs. Busted!
* A so called clean cut innocent looking guy that people call “Mr. Play It by the Books” was playing the field. Who would have thought? He didn’t learn his lesson before from a previous girlfriend who had caught him. Here’s what he would do. He would call his Queen Bee to make sure that she was home and once assured that she was tucked inside, he would start his gallivanting. Knowing location before you move is pivotal to cheating success ratios. This worked for a while, but everything runs its course. One evening, his girlfriend’s girlfriend saw his car in the new girlfriend’s driveway. Tongue twister, but Busted!
* A professional man on his way to the top comes home unannounced and finds his wife in their bed with another man. He went “postal.” A fight ensued and he is arrested. Holy torpedo! Now he has a mug shot!
* Two previously unknown to each other women effectively used Facebook Live to embarrass their mutual acquaintance, a man that each called her own until each found that they mutually shared him. Really! The suspicious woman had him investigated. Upon finding that he was as guilty as sin, she contacted the other woman and reached an agreement. The two women concocted a scheme. One took him to dinner and gave the location to the other woman. She walked in and sat at the same table. Ouch! So that he couldn’t deny it, they called a friend, and videotaped them beating the shared boyfriend. The relationship is over. He was dropped by both but with a well beaten behind. Wow!
My heading is spinning. Is yours?
So in this age of technology, cheating is tough to deny. Videotaping and cell phone cameras produce undeniable evidence. They come in handy! The worst exposure is the social media revelation. Public sharing via the internet (Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and others) can preserve the cheating, and embarrassing escapades for time indefinite. Nobody wants that! Right!
So if you choose to remain a cheater, and intervention does not work, get your story together. Think ahead!
5 Things to say if you get caught cheating:
1. Begging – (The Jimmy Swaggert defense) – Lie through your teeth.
2. Play Offense (The female defense) – Put the argument in a spin cycle to make all of it the other person’s fault.
3. Minimalism (The Eddie Murphy/Raw Defense) – Make the situation the most insignificant thing on the face of the earth.
4. Blame it on the alcohol (The T Pain Defense) – The liquor made you do it.
5. Deny, deny, deny (The R. Kelly Defense) – When all else fails, deny it.
Cheating becomes too much work! Agreed?
Maybe it’s better to find who you want and develop a healthy relationship. My thought! However, sometimes, I am in the minority.
In summary, cheating is talked about constantly. It remains one of the hottest gossipy items. If you are married or in a committed relationship, the sting hurts; the pain can be overbearing. Lives can get damaged. People can get hurt. Injuries can last.
Be careful. Always remember the tide may change when you least expect it. What goes around comes around. When and if it does, tag, you’ll it!
Photo credit: www.nymeta.co; Source: www.theurbandaily.com

PostHeaderIcon WHEN CHEATING OCCURS, REMEMBER THIS!

By Vernalee
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Without question, somewhere in our lives, we have experienced the agony of cheating. Regardless of the pain and the circumstances that preceded, you must deal with it. Don’t hold your head down – rise up, move on, and keep stepping as you learn from your past!
Here are 7 things to remember when you feel “cheated.” Take a look.
1. “The person who cheated on you is likely broken in more ways than you realize. – When people cheat in any arena, they diminish themselves – they directly threaten their own self-esteem and their relationships with others by undermining the trust they have in their ability to succeed and in their ability to be true. This, however, does NOT excuse their behavior.
2. The truth hurts, but it’s much healthier than holding on to the lies you once believed. – The really scary thing about undiscovered lies is that they have a greater capacity to diminish us in the long run than exposed lies. The truth heals, even if it hurts at first.
3. Arguing with someone who has intentionally hurt you only enflames the pain. – Truth be told, you are often most powerful and influential in an argument regarding betrayal when you are most silent. The perpetrator never expects silence.
4. It’s always best to wish people well, even if they don’t deserve it. – As Gandhi so profoundly said, “An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind.” If you spend your time and energy hoping someone will suffer the consequences for breaking your heart, then you’re allowing them to hurt you a second time in your mind.
5. Healing gets easier when you learn to accept an apology you never received. – Forgiveness is crucial for your healing. The key is to be mindful and grateful, despite what happened.
6. The person who hurt you doesn’t speak for the rest of us. – Every one of us suffers from at least one heart wrenching betrayal in our lifetime. In a backwards way, it’s what unites us. When it happens to you, the key is not to let one person’s despicable actions destroy your trust in others.
7. A wonderful, life-changing gift may not be wrapped as you expect. – When you don’t get what you want, sometimes it’s necessary preparation, and other times it’s necessary protection. But the time is never wasted. It’s a step on your journey. Someday you’re going look back on this time in your life as an important time of grieving and growing. You will see that you were in mourning and your heart was breaking, but your life was changing for the greater good.”
Forgive, move on, and stand your ground.
When you can be the bigger person, you rise and rise and rise!
Photo credit: www.understandingrelationships.com; Source: www.marchandangel.com – Author: Mark Chernoff

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