Posts Tagged ‘Control’


By Vernalee
As you probably recall, I love watching award shows and this young man that we call Drake – recently broke a 32-year record for the most American Music Awards (2016) nominations with 13 nods, beating Michael Jackson’s previous high mark of 11 from 1984. He won four.
To set the record straight, I have never purchased a rap album/cd and I did not buy Drake’s platinum “Hotline Bling” track.
And no, I am not running around singing Drake’s suggestive lyrics, “Call me on my cell phone.”
However, I love quotable quotes and his are impressive and thought provoking.
I became familiar with Drake in 2010 when riding in Atlanta with my daughter as she was listening to “I’m Doing Me,” one of his top hits, which was coincidentally the title of my first book.
So I guess you could say that he and I have something in common.
I discounted the knowledge of a newly discovered fact that his Uncle is singer bass guitarist Larry Graham, one of my all time favorites and contemporaries. At 30, Rapper Aubrey Drake Graham is younger than my son and daughter, but he does have a way with words that can capture anyone’s attention; so much so that his work was recently featured on The Today Show.
The segment was a quiz to determine what quotes came from Drake and which from Hallmark Greeting Cards. Incredible depth and comparison, I’ll say!
So here goes 25 of Drake’s top motivational quotes:
1. “Never let success get to your head and failure to your heart.”
2. “Kill them with success and bury them with a smile.”
3. “Haters will broadcast your failures, but whisper your success.”
4. “People will wish you all the success in the world and then hate you when you get it.”
5. “Jealousy is just love and hate at the same time.”
6. “Judge me, and you’ll have no time left to love me.”
7. “It’s never too late to realize what you want in your life and it’s never wrong to fight for it.”
8. “You know its real when you are who you think you are.”
9. “Smile and let everyone know that today, you’re a lot stronger than you were yesterday.”
10. “Strength isn’t always shown in what you can hold on to, sometimes it’s shown in what you can let go of.”
11. “I’m not confrontational, but if someone challenges, I’m not going to back down.”
12. “Always felt like my vision has been bigger than the bigger picture.”
13. “Everybody dies but not everybody lives.”
14. “The moment I stop having fun with it, I’ll be done with it.”
15. “Sometimes it’s the journey that teaches you a lot about the destination.”
16. “Know life is just a game in which the cards are facing down. I’m in the world where things are taken, never given; how long they choose to love you will never be your decision.”
17. “I was born to make mistakes, not to fake perfection.”
18. “Life can always change, you have to adjust.”
19. “Pain makes you stronger. Fear makes you braver. Heartbreak makes you wiser.”
20. “Count your blessings, not problems.”
21. “Everybody has an addiction, mine happens to be success.”
22. “I’m trying to do better than good enough.”
23. “Before you give up, think of the reason you held on so long.”
24. “When writing the story of your life, don’t let anyone else hold the pen.”
25. “When you look ahead and darkness is all you see, that’s when your faith and determination will pull you through.”
Without question, the above quotes as his lyrics embrace wisdom. I intend to use a few of Drake’s quotes from time to time.
All I can say to Drake is that you definitely know how to bring the message home even to a woman old enough to be your Mother!
I am aware that you are known to make many extemporaneous moves.
So … My dear, if you care to call me on my cell phone, do know that generally I take all of my calls! Certainly, yours would be my pleasure!
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By Vernalee
Which are you?
Does it matter?
Sure it does.
Both have pros and cons.
If you are the driver, you control the speed, the stops, and the turns; who you pick up and who you put out.
When you are in the driver’s seat, it is imperative that you concentrate.
You have to watch your moves and those of the other drivers.
Is there less stress on the passenger than the driver?
It depends!
The passenger may be “a back seat driver”
telling the driver where to turn, etc. Since passengers are not behind the wheel, sure they can look out the windows, watch the scenery, but they can also see views and dangers that the driver can’t see.
Passengers can help the driver navigate, aid him/her, and in many cases help prevent accidents.
They can see things coming from the sides while the driver is watching the front and rear views.
As long as they are riding together, both the driver and passenger arrive at the same destination.
Basically, it boils down to who is at the wheel; who is in control.
The control element is that you don’t want to end up in a destination that is not for you.
Neither do you want to arrive at the wrong place.
Your goal is to arrive safely; drama free.
Sometimes as you travel, the road gets bumpy. The steering become more strenuous.
You might have to stop, get out of the car, ask your passenger to leave, or the passenger may request getting out.
The ride or destination may not be right.
You catch my drift?
It’s a wonderful thing, if and when the passenger and driver are in sync.
With similar views, they can help each other as they collectively navigate their course.
It can be a beautiful ride with minimal turbulence…and great outcomes!
Are we discussing who’s in the car or are we discussing relationships?
Regardless … the same principles apply.
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By Vernalee
Last week, I stopped at PF Chang to pick up one of my favorite meals, Honey Chicken.
I am always anxious to open and read the message contained in my fortune cookie. My fortune cookie had this messsge.
“We can’t change the wind but we can adjust the sails!”
Intriguing, I’ll say.
We can’t change the wind, but we can adjust the sails is an expression that really means that –
we cannot control the things around us, but we can control our attitude, our actions and make our own choices.
Based upon the recent occurrences of hurricanes, we can attest to the fact that the power/strength of the wind and its path/direction cannot be controlled. To complex the matter even further is that we cannot see the wind. For certain, we can feel and see it effects. We can also hear its sometimes roar.
Sails, on the other hand, have a visible physical presence. Their triangular shape moves majestically as the power of the wind powers the movement and speed of the boat.
Adjusting the sail on a sailboat can help us to navigate the direction and speed by which we travel.
Sail boats and the velocity of the wind are in some respects similar to the travels in our life experiences.
And yes, our moves (adjustments of the sails) will demonstrate how we weather our storms.
We cannot in many cases control what happens, but we can navigate our responses; we can steer around and avoid troubles if we see them in time.
If we are given sufficient warnings and know that a storm is coming, we can turn the other way.
What we do and how we navigate will determine our outcomes . .. as we sail along, and in some cases alone.
And of course, we all want to sail in calm and peaceful waters.
We definitely want successful and healthy outcomes.
We may encounter confused periods and untraveled paths whereby we don’t know where to go or which way to turn.
We may even get lost a time or two.
Getting to where we need to go may be as tough as finding the answers or roadmaps to get there.
It’s no fun to be wandering around with no end in sight.
For sure, we don’t want to get lost and just float to No Where Land; not knowing where we are or how to get back to shore.
We want more successes than failures.
Therefore, we will probably be continuously adjusting our sails as we move through life.
Without question that would be the smart thing to do, particularly if we want to stay on the right course.
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By Vernalee
The white glistening sparkles of snow can be amazing to view. Children love to play in the snow, throw snow balls, and make those darling snowmen. As a southern girl, I am not a lover of snow and become petrified at the first major snowfall every year. So much for my weather dislikes and idiosyncrasies!
Let’s take a look at the metaphorical effects of snow when it is put in a snow ball rolling down a hill at an avalanche pace. Let’s now examine the snowball effect which is a situation in which something increases in size or importance at a faster and faster rate.
It is a “process that starts from an initial state of small significance and builds upon itself, becoming larger and also perhaps potentially dangerous or disastrous.” It can be beneficial or it can be a decline.
The common analogy is with the “rolling of a small ball of snow down a snow-covered hillside. As it rolls, the ball will pick up more snow; gaining more mass and surface area, and picking up even more snow and momentum as it rolls along.”
With that scientific definition out of the way, how many issues of snowball proportions can you recall or have you encountered recently? When all is positive, it is a great thing. But when the snowball is out of control rolling faster than the speed of sound, it can be a disaster; an accident waiting to happen. Slowing the pace or stopping the snowball roll altogether is challenging to say the least. It is no different than the happenstances of life.
It is for these reasons that we must keep our eyes on whatever it is that we are attempting or doing. We must have a fixation on the direction of our lives as best we can. For sure, once any aspect gets out of control and starts rolling downhill, catching it is a nightmare. Besides, running is not good when you are not in shape. Oh my, are you huffing and puffing like a train? No judgment!
In trying to catch an out of control fast moving object, we have to speed up our pace. If our momentum parallels that of a turtle’s speed, we are in trouble. Sometimes, it may occur swiftly or other times, it can take years, but we can become like the snowball racing down a slippery slope. The interesting dilemma is that the snow ball that started small, got bigger and bigger as it rolled, didn’t stop but picked up debri and whatever else that was in its path. It does not discriminate or discern trash. Sounds familiar? Trying to push it back up the hill is almost impossible. The grip brings a freeze to our hands making it difficult to hold. Silly me! I got sidetracked again. Am I referring to a snowball that started small, grew bigger; and because it was not stopped, continued to roll, picked up steam and speed, and is now out of control and not within reach? Or am I referring to a problem or one of our once small issues that grew in size, got out of control as it rolled; and befriended trashy people along the way because we either didn’t address it or allowed its velocity to control us? Which is it? You know the answer. It is obvious; rain or shine; snow or not!
Photo credit: www.shermanwealth. com


By Vernalee
When someone has you eating out of their hand, it means that you would do exactly what they ask you to do; no questions asked. It is a mind controlled thing whereby manipulation is often involved. Some of us may deny it; but many of us have been there at some point in our lives. Perhaps, no one is immune. Charismatic people, those that we love, or those that we want to be loved by – are the best candidates to feed us this nonexistent food. It’s a feeling; a strong feeling at that. It usually is a mind controlled thing. It has happened to the best of us despite our strong will. Love and being in love will do it! My words not yours. So when the aura in the atmospheric love zone compel you to ask “What’s for dinner?” … do know that you have metaphorically arrived and landed in the palm of someone’s hands!
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PostHeaderIcon I will not allow you or anyone to push my button!

By Vernalee
If you need to have a conversation with yourself to face the enemy, go right ahead. Talking to yourself occurs as we age. To some, it is a sign of maturity. Just don’t answer back! (Smile). So to you out there in the universe who are trying to defeat me; to make me stumble and fall; watch me “boss up!”
I know that you have probably glanced into your crystal ball. Perhaps, you thought that I would allow you to put your finger on my invisible and visible shortcomings. No ma’am! No sir! I outsmarted you this time. I will not permit you to enter my mind. My previous instantaneous reactions without thinking are a thing of the past. Sorry Charlie! You didn’t get what you thought; what you predicted.
Don’t you dare try to push my button! I will stop your fingers with my mind! It’s mind over matter!
Contrary to your belief, I will not explode like a nuclear bomb. That was the old me! I will not allow you to win! With God’s help and prayer, I am now in complete control! I have made a complete transformation.
Somewhere in time and space, since your last attack, I followed the admonition of the Book of Ephesians. I am wearing my suit of armor. I recognize you as the enemy. I see you as a walking devil roaming around. I will not succumb and place myself on your level. I am the victor, because I know that God can place my enemies at my foot stool. I have grown! I am strong in my faith! I am in control, but you are demonstrating through your actions that you are not! Stop! Look! Listen! Hey there … Clothed in my spiritual warfare garment, “How you like me now!”
Happy Sunday!

PostHeaderIcon Chiefs and Indians

By Vernalee
Q www.billbord.vom
Reportedly, when the historic “We are the World” was being recorded, conductor Quincy Jones made one introductory statement to the exceptionally talented singers. “Check your egos at the door” was Quincy’s simple phrase. Those six words solidified his leadership. While Bruce Springsteen, Michael Jackson, Tina Turner, Cyndi Lauper, Stevie Wonder and others were in “his house,” there was only one boss. That boss was unequivocally Quincy! All of the talented and veteran singers occupationally were “chiefs”, but in Quincy’s house for this recording, they were “Indians.” His instructions, directions and rules were the order of the day. He had the control baton in his hands.
What a lesson learned! No wonder “We are the World” was a highly acclaimed, award winning blockbuster success that climbed the charts while showcasing a captivating video. Its charitable proceeds fed and provided for many. Clearly, beyond the singers’ incredible talents and voices, the primary success factor rests with the fact that everyone knew their place! If you are a struggling boss with inferior leadership abilities, maybe you should walk a mile in Chief Quincy’s moccasins!
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